To the list of eighteen things that L. Williams and I are already planning to patent (some of which I would share, but y'all might be the thieving sort), I'm going to add the "Sit 'N' Squeeze".

No, this is brilliant, just wait.

It's going to be like riding the bull at the country bar.  Except, not.  In lieu of a nice, normal animal-shaped torso, it's going to be a bosu ball.  And you will straddle this bosu ball, immediately engaging your core.  I might give you stirrups.  I haven't decided yet.  But once you master posting, you'll have to post and squeeze (sensors for this!).  And once you master posting and squeezing, we're gonna make that damn ball move.

Okay, it would probably never appeal to the equestrian crowd.  But those weird gym people who like doing random fads?  Oh, yeah.

I bring this up to talk about my Monday ride.  (You go.. Monday?  I reply that I'll get to yesterday in a minute.)  When I got to the barn, the fellows were working on the water pump.  With machines and stuff.  And it only took me a moment, but I quickly realized that the drilling stuff didn't sway BO from riding, so Archie was running around and screaming his head off.

When I finally caught him, we spent a few minutes lunging on the lead rope, trying to get him to focus on me and my verbal cues.  It wasn't amazing.  He's gotten pretty nasty about kicking out lately, so we've got to spend a day and just work on that.  I wish I had a round pen.  Anyways, I had started grooming him by the time that BO returned from her ride and Archie visibly relaxed upon seeing Skinny Guy.  We had a little discussion that he needs to start preparing himself for separation, because, unfortunately, Skinny Guy won't live forever.. Or I might move the Arch.

I considered him "warmed up" when I mounted, given that he'd been galloping circles around me, so I just walked him a lap before I asked him to start trotting.  And then we spent time doing figure-eights before we ended on jumping the cross rail a few times.  We had to have one discussion when he spooked at a bird and another when he landed from the cross rail cantering and immediately started bucking/crow hopping.  I hate that crap.

But the emphasis of the entire ride, every single stride, was forward.  Sit, squeeze.  Sit, squeeze.  Go, go, go.  Answer is always go.  When you act like a shit, you still have to go.  It was a hard work out and my right hip joint was still unhappy from all the squeezing the day prior.  But, honestly?  One of the best rides we've had and I really felt like I had my "true" Archie beneath me.  He was engaged, he was forward, he was fucking beautiful.

I did good, Mom?  I did good?

And yesterday?  I went to Charleston on business.  I was a grown up.  I sat at my conference.  I ate at a strange restaurant that I found on Yelp.  I chatted with the bartender.  I talked to other strangers.  I discussed lacto-ovo vegetarianism with the new veggie wearing leather kicks (who was also leading the course.. er).  And at the end of the day, I found a place to go to (that no one told me about, but the bartender confirmed) where I could take photos and walk around before I got back in my company-provided vehicle and drove the speed limit the entire way home.  I'll share some of those photos later, but I suck at landscape.  No feel for it.

Pitch black and raining.  Awesome way to start.

Thrilled.

I went to a BBQ because they generally have great salads and sides.  Think about it.

They have carriage horses, too.

Almost home.

Today's riding epiphany brought to you by: the Bold Archer, spooking at sounds since '06.

I worked Archie pretty hard yesterday. Downward transitions, bending and counter-bending, and just working hard on keeping that forward momentum while in a frame. So, today, all I was craving was a simple walking trail ride around the property.

He spooked when we heard a kid yelling in the woods, when a branch snapped, when we came across the boat trailer he's seen a dozen times, when the rooster crowed in front of him, when the rooster crowed next to him, when the rooster crowed behind him, when the tree creaked against the other tree, and when the neighbor opened his shed. Archie did full body tremors when a branch rubbed his butt, when the Skinny Guy started screaming, and when I made him walk by a rusted barrel that he had already seen in the other direction.

Is this the Spring Stupids or a horse who has lost confidence in his rider?

The epiphany was this: if I am devoted to my horse as I say I am, in that I will not replace him with another until he is happily retired or semi-retired, then I need to give up being the rider I want to be and instead be the rider he needs me to be.

And my horse, my pushy, opinionated, arthritic wonderpony, needs me to be more confident. I previously confused that with pushing his physical limits, but it's not about cantering more or jumping more. He simply needs me to make a decision and get us both there. Today, that meant being decisive that I would not dismount when he was stupid and would not play a fool to his antics, instead, I would consistently and persistently push him forward with my leg and my seat and my voice, while still asking him to do the things he has to do: frame and straight and responsive.

It was one of my hardest rides and, without a doubt, the most difficult half-hour walking trail ride I've ever done.

I've heard of "baby brain", where the kid is eating all of your nutrients (sarcastically said) and your brain just.. stops functioning to a degree.

That said, I think I have "house brain".  All I want to talk about is the house, but god forbid you say something that goes against the plans I have (like paint color, room usage, bushes planted) because I will smite you with my razor-bladed tongue.

Why, yes, I did check this out.  Even though my "style" is more owl and blue than Southern, whatever.

Which is to say that I had House Brain and forgot about most of today's plans.  My husband and I were invited (invited!) to the grand opening of a beer garden in town.  I feel like it's going to be a big function, but it eats the riding opportunity from the night.  Instead, I'm going to walk around downtown with my camera and wait for the Man to meet me.  But, missing the ride?  Not as big of a deal as it would have been last week.  Join me in rejoicing:

DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME BEGINS