THIS JUST HAPPENED!!! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😃😃 #archieandanniesadventures @equestrianathart

A video posted by bekaburke (@bekaburke) on May 14, 2016 at 7:49am PDT

Guys.  Guys.  Guys.

Okay.  Breathe.  It's memories now.  But still some awesome fucking memories.

Trail buddy and I had talked about a year ago about going on a beach adventure together.  Okay, I can't really remember the precise time.  But I declined the concept because Grandpa was either crippled or had just temporarily finished being crippled or something.  I didn't think it was a good idea.  And none of the beaches we found were agreeable to horses year-round.

And then Hillary brought it up and Hillary did the research and gave me phone numbers to call and I talked to people and I told trail buddy that, hey, we're thinking hard about going to the beach.  Things worked out and trail buddy was able to join us (and drive us) with her quiet baby palomino, content to offset the slightly warm Thoroughbreds.

We planned to leave the barn at 6:30 on Sunday morning.  My husband, the bestest husband ever, had bought us a ton of delicious pastries for our road-trip breakfasts on Saturday and Sunday.  So I loaded up Archie's crap, Archie, a banana fritter, some diet cokes, a bottle of water and a change of clothes and took my job as navigator seriously.  After two hours and roughly twenty-two roundabouts, I led us to the wrong park.  But, fortunately, it was only about ten minutes back to the right park.  It was a whopping $2 per person to take our ponies on the beach.

While we were tacking up, other people with horses arrived to the parking lot.  The park ranger had told us that there was a limit of fifteen horses on the beach at one time, so I made sure that we were registered properly and wouldn't get kicked out.  We made it on the sand before the other horses had tacked up, which made me immensely happy because it was one less issue to worry about.

Two TB butts.

Walking on the beach initially was a little scary.  To our left was the dunes and deep sand and four-wheel-drive vehicles getting stuck and kicking up sand.  To our right were parked pickups on the ideal sand with fishing poles and lines everywhere and children.  Archie has never offered to trample a child, but it's a legit fear.

Baby Ginger is such a good baby!

After about ten or twenty minutes of the horses walking like fucking champs, we hit the end of where the vehicles could be and also hit the perfect mixture of sand and water.  We slowly walked the horses in, but at the recommendation of my trail buddy, we walked them at an angle to the water rather than directly in.  I would have never thought of that but it worked perfectly.  Her gelding was a bit hesitant still, so Hillary slowly used Annie to maneuver him into the water.

Baby Ginger has herding skills.

We took turns trotting in the water and playing around before we continued on down the beach.  We had one little trot session, all giggling like fucking loons, before we broke back to the walk.  After the horses were both cooled out and warmed up, we had to do a little run.  Because, guys, the fucking beach.

These waves are scary.

After passing another group of cars, we decided to turn around before we ran into too many people.  We encountered a large group of horses (fifteen, my ass) and none of ours cared.  Then we got back to the magical area where the waves were calm and took turns cantering and running in the water.  My trail buddy's baby gelding wasn't keen on leaving the group, so we used Archie as a guide for him, which, you know, my egotistical alpha gelding just fucking loved.

My horse's hoof prints on the beach.

While we were in the magical area and after everyone had had a chance to run around, I said that I wanted to take Archie swimming.  Because I grew up with the Black Stallion and the Bay Gelding is a million times better in real life.  So I dropped his tack and my boots and my trail buddy gave me a leg up (because her gelding is so much easier to get back on) and I encouraged Archie into the water.



Then we headed back to the trailer, untacked the ponies, watered them and sponged them off and headed back to Savannah.  During this return trip, I learned that Florida cares a lot more about the animals leaving the state and that McDonalds has the best diet coke because they filter the water.

Many, many thanks to Hillary for doing the research, to trail buddy for driving us and being so enthusiastic and knowledgeable, and my vet for sending us health certificates at the end of the day and also answering my questions about Archie's physical ability to go on this trip.

I kept saying over and over, we are so fortunate.  And even if you never get to gallop your horse on the beach, you're fortunate.  We're so lucky to be able to live our dreams with these animals, with our friends, with these memories.

Disclaimer:  hey, guys, remember when I talked about eighteen months ago about starting a job I wasn't really qualified for?  What I lacked in knowledge and experience, I made up for with fucking tenacity and trainability.  And I've recently been promoted.  This changes my life from sitting at a desk for eight hours a day to being in the field for the majority of the day.  Talking to people.  Fixing things.  Panicking when shit stays broken.  Which means... less time for blogging.  I'm also helping to train my potential replacement, who I hope isn't my actual replacement, because he already thinks he knows the job, despite my corrections, and I've warned my new supervisor that I'm 99.78% positive that I'll be pulling a knife out of my back eventually.  So no blogging around him, either.

But on to the ponies!

On Friday, yeah, over a week ago, Hillary and I woke up early and had breakfast at a little chain shop then met my trail riding buddy at the barn.  We loaded Archie on Hillary's trailer (WITH NO ISSUES!), loaded the wonder ginger, and followed trail buddy to her friend's barn, where we picked up horse number four.  Following them, we were led to a little dirt road on the dead end of some questionable dirt road street (not that I have anything against dirt road streets). We'd already tossed saddles on the ponies before the trailer and promptly finished the tacking up process and started out on the dirt road.












After taking the kids back to the barn, hosing them off and checking them over, we headed back to my house and cleaned up before going to lunch and getting manis/pedis.  None of the equestrians I'm friends with are interested in going because horses ruin manicures.  So mayyyybe I was little excited.

At Jen and Friend's, where they make my martini as soon as I walk in the door...

Some random super old helmet that you can purchase as art for $70.

If only she could show in it.

Since I believe whole-heartedly that sharing anything on my blog will ruin it, I didn't mention this. Hillary did, though.  :)

On Thursday, I left work early, swung by my house and changed clothes, then met my barn manager out at my barn.  Because we had company coming.

Hillary and I have been blogging besties for a few years now and text, oh, daily.  One night, I invited her to come down and bring a pony.  Adventures.  Adventures forever.  We worked out the logistics and kinks and on Thursday afternoon, I had the intense pleasure of welcoming her, Annie and her pup Sonny to the barn.  Guys, I shit you not, it's like I've known this woman for my entire life.

All the boys, watching her walk.

Archie was immediately smitten.

 We put the wonder ginger out in a pasture, watched her for a little bit, and then went out for a late lunch.  Margaritas and friends and talks about horses and, yeah, it was awesome.  After the lunch, we went back to the barn and saddled up for a short trail ride.  I can't stress enough how amazing her "little" mare is.  Long trailer ride, strange place, giant mutant bugs everywhere, and a gelding who is immediately smitten, and no fucks given.

I took this for my coworker.

An amazing trail dog.

Giving the Archer head scritches.

Ponies were untacked, turned out, and we headed back to my house.  It was time to introduce Sonny to the best bitches, who, honestly, aren't the best.  Savannah is amazing, but Scarlette is what is called "reactive".  Hence the drugs.  I put them on leashes and we walked a little way from my house to let them sniff and snort at Sonny.  When they decided that he was okay, we turned them loose in my back yard, where the best bitches promptly tackled and cornered poor Sonny and then proceeded to follow him in a high-speed circular chase for ten minutes.  The old ladies did their best to keep up with the young whipper-snapper.  Finally, pack mentality was somewhat achieved and we started preparing for dinner.

Even though he might have given her love nibbles on her ears, Savannah was madly in love with Sonny.

D joined us for dinner at a small local restaurant called the Green Pub, known for its beer and burgers and farm-to-table cooking.   It has a jukebox and hipsters and pimento cheese and disgusting homemade ketchup.  But, all-in-all, amazing.  And thus ended day one.

Archie is very light in the bridle, very responsive, and has never needed anything more than a rider with better hands.  Sorry, dude.  Contact, on the rare occasions that I take it these days, is measured in ounces, not pounds.



When I first started riding him, back in 2005, he was in a simple D-ring snaffle.  He went fine in it, so there was no reason to change it.  When we moved to Savannah, I decided to try him in a Happy Mouth double-jointed roller, for no reason other than that I thought it would be more comfortable in his mouth.  When at the vet's meet and greet back in February, the topic of bits came up and The (now very pregnant) Eventer tossed a new one in my hands and told me to try it.

So I did.  And while another horse might be a better test, I found that the Kid enjoyed it and it met my need to be sympathetic to his mouth.

Let me introduce to you the Pacifier, Archie's leather bit.

Before first use.

After first use.

Initially, the Pacifier is a straight piece of rolled leather.  It doesn't appear stained or tanned or whatever it is that changes the color of leather, and rightly so - it's going in my pony's mouth!  The D-rings also appear slightly bigger than those on my Happy Mouth, which suits me just fine.  I like a flashy D (thanks, h/j days).  After using the bit for a few rides, the color of the mouthpiece darkened (saliva) and it molded into the shape of his mouth.  Hello, custom fucking bit.  Pieces of chewed grass obviously optional.


While, again, crippled geriatrics aren't the most reliable guinea pigs, I will say that he's done everything I've asked of him with no issues.  We've been able to have the same normal transitions, the same level of flex and bend, and he does the baby dressage that I rarely ask for (um, yeah, leg yields) just fine.  I never felt like I didn't have enough in his mouth for running away from wild hogs or angry canters in the woods or backing his temper-tantrum butt into trees.

After a couple months' use.

You can see how it's created a natural curve from resting above his tongue (I think?)

The bit is currently USEF approved but not USDF approved.  A moot point for us, but maybe not for you.  The Eventer wrote about it here.  Her video review of it here.  And the maker's website is here.  It's not the flashiest page, but yay for lower-overheads.  The bit comes in three versions, a D ring, a loose ring, and a three ring.

i just like this photo.