VCBH: Your Equestrian Fashion

9:56 AM
By Beka Burke
9 Comments

From L: I want a pictorial tour of your closet. Not your riding clothes, but your equivalent of the crazy cat lady ugly cat sweater.

First, a Christmas gift:

NWT. Something about me screams "country", I guess.

Second, shirts I have no business owning, but were on discount at Tractor Supply. No idea what I was thinking, because my tig o' bitties sure as shit don't fit.

"Horses are God's apology for men." Says the atheist.

Then, I bought this at JC Penny's in the junior section and promptly forgot all about it:

My couple of "Life is Good" shirts. I used to have a "Jumping Jake" hat and I wore it religiously.. until my dogs ate it.

The "Hot to Trot" makes me angry because it's clearly cantering.

The requisite "Last Unicorn" shirt.

And the plethora of sweat-stained, stretched and ripped IHSA show shirts. I know I'm missing some, including my team shirt. If my husband could steal these and burn them, he would.

Front.

Back.

The rare long-sleeved shirt.

1. Our motto is practice, practice, practice.
2. We don't mind getting down and dirty.
3. We'll jump anything you put in front of us.
4. We don't tire out easily, we can ride all day and night.
5. We move with the motion.
6. After a hard workout, we give great rubdowns.
7. We're great with our hands.
8. We know it's not the size of the mount, it's how hard you ride.
9. We come equipped with whips, spurs, and knee high leather boots. And we know how to use them.
10. We're always on top.